Me....venting

This past week was CRAZY, to say the least. In that one week, I felt pain and loss like I'd never before. This awakened me to the sad fact that some day, each and everyone of us will loose those things we sometimes overlook, but hold dearest to our hearts.
But My God was good, and I am thankful to be where I am today. But even today, I am filled with different conflicting emotions and feelings that make me search for that one person that fits ALL my criterias, just so that I can pour out these feelings and thoughts to. I think about the Ultimate One, but somehow, I feel I need someone "closer by". How weird is that???

For the past few months, I've been wrestling with my needs/wants, what I believe I am entitled to and how I don't seem to be getting the respect I deserve and work for. The funny thing is that this has to do with those closest to me, and not the crazy co-worker or annoying boss. Why can't I get that "thank you" and "I'm sorry you're right" when it's most needed??? Why, Lord, do I have to be the one to take all the unnecessary crap just because of the position you have put me in? Why can't people learn? Why? Why? Why?????

God has been faithful so far, and He continues to show me that He is still in the midst of everything I consider to be "crap" that occurs daily. But what am I not doing? Why should I have to put up with this for a day longer? Why should I keep serving so much when I feel my work load should be cut in half?

Lord,I am so frustrated, tired and upset with myself because this isn't me and my heart isn't glad with all I do.How long will I have to care when they seem to have other important issues on their plate??? I just want to run away and be free from all this.